Eliminating Social Anxiety: How to be the Perfect Party Guest

Story time: over the Labor Day weekend I was asked to attend an all-white party where I would be the youngest in attendance. I took a sip of my favorite wine, gave myself a pep-talk and sashayed into the event. Anxiety is very real. Below is a list of 5 tips that will help you eliminate anxiety and be the perfect party guest.


Throwing a party is NOT cheap. Make your host’s job a bit easier by guaranteeing your arrival so they know how much food to buy. When you show up without RSVPing you become an uninvited guest. Not cute. Speaking of uninvited guests, it is considered rude to bring a plus one if the host did not advise you to do so. If your cousin comes to visit, run it by the host as soon as possible so they can accurately prepare.

#2 Bring a Gift

Yes, it is rude to show up to a party empty handed (office parties and ceremonies are the only exception.) However, that’s not what this is about. When you bring something to the table you feel more entitled to be in that space; thus, increasing your confidence when you walk into the room. Plus, having something in hand will make the gift the main attraction so all eyes won’t be on you when you walk in. 

#3 Look Amazing

Nails done, hair done, everything did! The formula is simple: when you look good you feel good. I know sometimes it’s hard to look good on a budget. Just remember, simply, classy, and clean is always a look.

#4 Speak Up!

I bet everyone’s social anxiety just went through the roof. No worries, we got this. To ensure great convo show up to the party about 20-30minutes after it starts. This gives you a minute to scope the room while it is half full. Below are the best ways to start a conversation.


  • Sit at the table with the people who look most like you.
  • Pay a compliment to the quietest woman at the table. 
  • Ask the most talkative person at the table how they met the host.

BOOM! Now you’ve got the shyest person engaged by paying a compliment, and you’ve got the most talkative person telling a story that will keep everyone engaged and produce spin off convos. 

#5 Know When to Leave

There is nothing worse than having a guest who does not know when to leave. As my mom always said, “let people miss you.” The best time to leave is right after the main event takes place. Whether it’s a cake cutting, the gender of a baby has been revealed, or the main course of a meal has been served. After the main event, please leave. 


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