The Girl No One Likes: The Pretty Truth

The Girl No One Likes: The Pretty Truth

Is it hard for you to keep friends, a significant other (trust me I feel you on this one.), or do you consistently get looked over in your job? Maybe you’re the girl no one likes. Here’s the pretty truth: 

#1:  Do You Take Up Space? 

Shy and timid is so last season. Haven’t you heard? Confident and self-assured is in. No one likes the girl who blends into the background. It sends a signal that perhaps you don’t want to be seen. If you don’t want to even be seen then why should anyone else in the room respect you? 

  

 I know that sounds harsh, but that’s how people think. Whenever the temptation to shrink yourself begins to creep in and choke you; just remember, you are worthy to be in all high places and social events. Sit up Straight, shoulders back, and act like you’re somebody

#2: Are You Thirsty? 

Are we still using the word “thirsty” in 2021? Either way, don’t be it. Sometimes when we’ve experienced seasons of severe rejection, we tend to adopt the spirit of desperation. You know that group of girls don’t really like you; stop inserting yourself into their weekend fun. You know that job will replace you at the drop of a dime; stop working weekends trying to impress your higher-ups when you can use that energy to create something you can’t be fired from. We end up being so thirsty for a “yes” that we end up settling for a maybe. 

Maybe this group of girls will finally accept me if I show them how funny and outgoing I am. Maybe if I work on weekends, it’ll show my boss that I’m worthy of a raise. The truth: people like those who have standards, not those who place their self-respect up for collateral. Have the courage to wait for your “yes” so that you can avoid being the thirsty girl no one respects.  

#3: Do You Talk Too Much? 

We’ve heard the saying, “Never show your cards first.” When you talk too much you could be offending someone with your strong opinion (I had to learn this the hard way), or you could be giving someone the blueprint to your heart prematurely. No one likes this girl, because she ruins the fun and mystery of getting to know her. 

If you want to build and keep lasting relationships learn to listen more than you speak.  It is human nature to want to feel seen and heard. Use that to your advantage by allowing others to talk until their heart’s content. Then, you can be the one to decide if you like them, not the other way around. 

  

#4: Can You Pass the Mirror Test ?

We often see ourselves in a much brighter light than society does. For example, most women don’t know when they’re dressing promiscuous; they think it’s “cute/trendy.” Most people don’t realize when they’re being annoying; they think they’re just having fun. Get in the habit of seeing yourself from the outside in. The best way to do this is to people watch.  

 

The next time you’re out at brunch or going for a walk. Look around you. Look at the girls who you would be friends with? How do they dress? How do they behave? Look at the girls who you would hate for your son to bring home. How do they dress? How do they behave? If you’re honest with yourself, which group do you look the most like? No one likes the girl who isn’t self-aware 

Thank you so much for reading! For more life hacks check out my audiobook Clean Mirrors. As always, share this with a friend who needs to hear this. We’ll talk soon.  

If you want to break generational curses and walk in your full potential, subscribing to our email list is the fastest and easiest way to get on the right track.

Make Them Say, “Yes!”: 4 Secrets of Negotiation

Make Them Say, "Yes": 4 Secrets of Negotiation

Make them say, “Yes!” Did you know life is just one big negotiation? Whether it’s the job you want, or that attractive special someone on Instagram. What if I told you there is a way you can make anyone say yes? Check out these four secrets of negotiation. 

#1: Look Good, But Not Too Good 

Did you know, no one likes a 10? Hard truth: no one really liked the prettiest girl in school, they liked her slightly less attractive best friend more. When you are too attractive, people regard you as competition which will have them betting against you, not for you. The key to negotiating is to get the other person feeling like you are on their team (in their ball-park of attractiveness.) 

Your best bet is to look only slightly better than the person you’re trying to convince. Make others feel like they are lucky to have you, and it will have them saying, “yes” simply because it’s human nature to place trust in attainably attractive people  

#2: Be Well-Spoken 

Do you sound like you’re from an inner city or a rural area? People judge you based on how you speak. Drawing out unnecessary syllables will make you come across as “country” or illiterate. Speaking too fast or using profanity will make it seem as though you don’t have an expansive vocabulary.

When you are not well spoken in a negotiation room it sends a signal to others that perhaps you are easily manipulated. They will try to speak over your head as a means to insult you or cut you an unfair deal.  

To improve your speech, record yourself reading aloud so that you can perfect your rhythm and vocabulary. So, the next time you walk into a negotiation room you’ll be so well spoken and respected that they can’t help but tell you, “Yes!” 

#3: Add Value 

What novelty do you bring to the table? Sad truth: most people are simply ordinary. So, if you want to be extraordinary then you need to surpass the average. Over 70% of Americans are overweight, if you want to be set apart then be a part of the 30% who are not overweight. The average man reports that millennial women are hard to approach or rude in some fashion. So, if you walk around humble, smiling and gracious then you automatically are set apart.  

A huge part of “value” is determined by rarity. The rarer you become, the more valuable you are. Become the rarest person your group of friends, significant other, and employer has ever met and you will have them saying, “Yes!” like never before 

  

#4: Ask for More Than What You Want 

This is the same concept of, “If you reach for the stars you’ll at least land on the moon.” If you’re okay with getting $60,000 on your job; then, ask for $68,000.  

 

Asking for more than what you really want creates a seemingly win-win scenario, because it allows you to come across as flexible while also allowing the other person to flex their negotiating skills. When you finally meet “in the middle” you’ll actually be getting what you’ve wanted all along. 

Thank you so much for reading! For more life hacks check out my audiobook Clean Mirrors. As always, share this with a friend who needs to hear this. We’ll talk soon.  

If you want to break generational curses and walk in your full potential, subscribing to our email list is the fastest and easiest way to get on the right track.